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Understanding Masking and the Journey to Unmasking
When I was younger, I didn’t realize that I had ADHD. My struggles to stay focused or organized were constant, but instead of getting the help I needed, I began to mask. I hid my struggles, my differences, and my true self. Masking is something many neurodivergent individuals do—conforming to the expectations of a neurotypical world in order to fit in. It often stems from feelings of shame or the fear of being judged.
But over time, this constant hiding can take a toll. I remember feeling isolated, even depressed, as I worked hard to pretend everything was fine. It wasn’t until much later in life, when I embraced my neurodiversity, that I began to experience the true joy of being myself. Unmasking—allowing my authentic self to emerge—was a profound and liberating experience. It brought personal growth and fulfillment in ways I could never have imagined.
I began to understand that my ADHD wasn’t just a challenge; it also came with incredible strengths. Creativity, resilience, and out-of-the-box thinking weren’t just buzzwords—they were part of who I was. Once I stopped hiding, I was able to tap into these strengths in ways that made me feel empowered, not hindered.
ADHD as a Source of Strength
It’s easy to focus on the struggles that come with ADHD: the difficulty staying organized, the impulsivity, the distractibility. But there’s a whole other side to ADHD that often gets overlooked—the incredible strengths that often come hand-in-hand with neurodivergence.
For example, children with ADHD are often highly creative. Their brains are wired to think in ways that aren’t linear, which can make them fantastic problem solvers and imaginative thinkers. In a world that increasingly values innovation and out-of-the-box thinking, this creativity is a gift. It might not fit neatly into a traditional classroom, but that doesn’t mean it isn’t valuable.
Another strength is resilience. Living with ADHD means navigating a world that wasn’t designed for neurodivergent brains. Children who do this daily develop resilience—an ability to bounce back from setbacks and keep going, even when things are tough. This perseverance will serve them well in life, as it teaches them how to overcome obstacles, find solutions, and believe in themselves even when the path is difficult.
And then there’s hyperfocus—a trait that can be both a challenge and a gift. When a person with ADHD finds something that truly captivates their interest, they can dive into it with incredible focus and intensity. It’s in these moments that their true passion can shine, and that passion is something that can lead to great success, especially when supported and guided.
Reframing Neurodivergence as a Gift
One of the most important things we can do for neurodivergent children is to help them reframe how they see themselves. Instead of viewing their ADHD as a deficit or a problem that needs fixing, we can show them how to see it as a gift. With the right support, children with ADHD can learn to harness their unique strengths and use them to thrive. This means creating environments where they feel understood, valued, and celebrated for who they are—not just for how well they can conform.
As a parent or educator, you have the power to help children see the beauty in their neurodivergence. By focusing on their strengths, offering encouragement, and creating opportunities for them to succeed, you can help them build confidence in their abilities. This process isn’t always easy, but it’s worth it.
A Message of Hope
If your child is struggling with ADHD or masking, take heart. There is so much potential inside them waiting to be unlocked. The key is to help them see that their neurodivergent traits are not something to hide or be ashamed of. They are gifts—gifts that can flourish with the right support and understanding.
Neurodiversity brings richness and depth to the world. It gives us thinkers who see problems in new ways, creators who challenge the status quo, and resilient individuals who keep going even when things are hard. Your child has their own unique strengths, and with your love and guidance, they will learn to shine.
Celebrate the gifts of neurodiversity. Embrace the quirks, the creativity, and the resilience that come with ADHD. Because at the end of the day, these traits aren’t just part of the challenges—they are the very things that make neurodivergent individuals so incredibly special.